Neebone

What the f...?

Toddlers Shoot Up Family Home
Thursday, August 9th, 2007

A 6-year-old boy is recovering after being shot Tuesday night, WISN-TV reported.
Milwaukee police said a 3-year-old girl found a gun inside a home near Teutonia Avenue and Chambers Street and pulled the trigger.
A 32-year-old man who lives in the house told police he stores a loaded gun behind the stove and that the girl got […]

Man Breaks In To Apartment, Steals Salad
Wednesday, June 20th, 2007

Someone kicked in the door of a man’s apartment, stuck a knife in the door and took a chilled salad from his refrigerator.
Somerset police said the man reported the bizarre burglary on Monday. He told investigators someone broke into his apartment while he went to a nearby tavern. Nothing but the salad was missing, police […]

Suicide Attempt Gets Biblical. Jesus Wants His Parker Back
Monday, June 18th, 2007

A Marion County Jail inmate tried to commit suicide by hammering an ink pen in to his left eye with a Bible, officials said.
Corrections officers said they used a Taser to prevent Lester Williams, 28, from further harming himself on Saturday night.
Williams’ eye was not seriously injured.
After being treated at Shands hospital at the University […]

Woman Beat Upside Head With Piece Of Wood - For No Reason
Thursday, May 10th, 2007

An elderly woman suffered fractures after being based with a block of wood in northwest Queensland.
Police said the 69-year-old was in a Mount Isa music store yesterday when a 21-year-old man allegedly entered the shop and struck her repeatedly on the arm and head with the block of wood.
The offender left the store without taking […]

Wife Makes Husband Curry. Husband Admits It Tasted A Bit Crap
Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

You’d think you might be able to have a civil relationship whilst being estranged from you wife - a quiet friendly curry perhaps. Well no. Especially when said wife adds doo-doo for seasoning.
Jill Martin, 47, pleaded guilty at Paisley Sheriff Court to culpable and reckless conduct against husband Donald Martin.
On 13th March, Jill watched her […]

Going Ghetto Gangsta In Ethiopia
Monday, April 23rd, 2007

Mursi Tribeswoman with iPod and AK-47

Anyone got any interesting insight on this? Let us know in the comments section below.

2-Carat Diamond Obtained From Prisoners Ass
Thursday, March 29th, 2007

Police suspected that one of four men accused of robbing a jewellery store in the Canton area on Tuesday swallowed a 2-carat diamond ring worth $30,000.
Turns out they were right. The ring was found in the toilet inside the man’s jail cell.
Police alerted the sheriff’s office to the possibility that the suspect had swallowed the […]

No Sex In Japanese Marriages
Tuesday, March 27th, 2007

“My research shows that if you don’t have sex for a month, you probably won’t for a year. This is very bad news for the country’s birth rate, and something the Government needs to look into urgently.” said Kunio Kitamura, the director of the country’s Family Planning Association.
His survey of 1,400 people showed that 39.7 […]

88-Year Old Woman Shot 10 Times: “Come Get Some!”
Monday, March 19th, 2007

An 88-year-old woman in Orlando, Florida, was in stable condition Monday after several men surrounded her bedroom and opened fire, hitting her as many as 10 times with bullets, for some unknown reason.
“At this point, we don’t believe it to be random,” Orange County sheriff’s Lt. Jeff Stonebreaker said. “We don’t believe it to be […]

Bum Scare As Suspect Package Discovered In Ass At LAX
Wednesday, March 7th, 2007

From the article:

An Iraqi national with a half-inch magnet coiled in wire hidden inside his body drew a bomb-squad response and a terrorism investigation Tuesday when he tried to pass through security at Los Angeles International Airport.
[…]
But airport security agents initially considered the odd assortment of objects in al-Maliki’s rectum alarming enough to order an […]

Shave Me Baby One Last Time
Sunday, February 18th, 2007

Oops she’s done it again. Another stupid (unintentional) stunt has landed Britney Spears in the headlines. This time it’s after she decided to get her head shaved and tattoo “lips” on her wrists. Ace.
Britney Spears aka Teal’c of Stargate fame, love child of Sinead O’Connor and Lou Gosset, went into a hair parlor to get […]

Undead To Walk Streets Of London
Monday, February 12th, 2007

BRAINS!
No we’re not talking about the Victoria Line during rush-hour, we’re talking about zombies walking the streets of London. Well thats according to fleshmob.co.uk.
A ‘Flesh mob’ is when a bunch of people turn up at a designated place dressed as zombies and start to eat the brains of passers-by (ok, maybe not that last part).
Commuters […]

Opportunist Steals Sword From Knife Shop. Robbery Ensues
Wednesday, February 7th, 2007

“He stuck it in my throat and said give me all your money. I thought he was joking at first, and he said again, ‘Give me all of your money or I will stick you,’”. Chandler Braley thought he was joking? Well he thought wrong.
The man had walked into the Neptune Beach knife shop, Knives […]

Big-Ass Baby Born In Mexico. “Is It A Whale? Is It A Plane? No It’s SUPER TONIO!!”
Thursday, February 1st, 2007

He’s big. He’s Mexican. He drinks a shit load of milk.
Yes folks, 14.1lbs of newborn Antonio “Super Tonio” Vasconcelos (yes, that’s a real nickname) was delivered by caesarean section in Cancun.
In three days, Supe’s gained seven ounces and now weighs in at 14.5lbs and measures 22 inches in length.
“We haven’t found any abnormality in […]

Killer Python Devours 11 Dogs
Friday, January 26th, 2007

[Ok so the pic has nothing to do with the article but we thought it was cool anyway…]
“long enough to span the width of a tennis court and as thick as a tree trunk.” - that was the description of a huge python which is the suspected culprit involved in the killing (and eating) of […]

Todays Traffic Accidents, Bitings, Car Jackings And Tree Climbings Are Brought To You By Fort Lauderdale
Wednesday, January 24th, 2007

What started out as a minor crash Tuesday morning, ended up with a broken bike, a bit driver, an attempted carjacking, and a suspect trying to hide in a tree, the Broward Sheriff’s Office said.
Here’s what BSO spokesman Hugh Graf said happened just before 8 a.m. on Tuesday:

Frank Henry John, 41, was driving a 2005 […]

Six Legged, Double-Vagina’d Cow. 5-Assed Monkey Wants A Swap
Monday, January 15th, 2007

“The calf has six legs, two vaginas and six nipples,” explained the animal’s owner, Salvador Vanegas.
Vanegas says this is the first time he’s come across such a strange beast in all his years of raising animals (you don’t say).
“Some people (were) horrified while looking at the calf with the six legs, but what can we […]

Gas Cooker Destroys Island. Too Many Cooks…
Friday, January 12th, 2007

An accident on the tiny Caribbean island of Soledad Miria was caused when an inhabitant switched on a faulty cooking appliance. The resulting explosion devastated the island.
The blast caused an inferno which took only 10 minutes to destroy half the settlement as more gas cylinders in other wooden homes detonated.
1,014 inhabitants either jumped into the […]

Bestiality Charges Dropped. Horse Relieved (If You Know What I’m Sayin’)
Monday, December 18th, 2006

Tina Maree Watkins, 35, of Lismore, has had bestiality charges dropped for allegedly engaging in sex with a horse. She still faces a charge of behaving in an offense manner though (possibly giving the horse an “Ann Frank”?)
A psychiatric report is to be carried out to see if Tina will be eligible to have the […]

Job Cuts Force Elves In To Law Enforcement
Sunday, December 10th, 2006

Orange County Sheriff’s Office have a problem with speeders. They needed to solve this problem fast. The solution? Operation ELF: Enforcing Limits and Fining speeders. Yes readers, Orange County has hired Santa’s little helpers to patrol the highway and catch evil doers.
But why elves? Why not the Grinch or the little baby Jesus? Ken Wyne […]

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