3. While it’s an offence to drop litter on the pavement, it’s not an offence to throw it over someone’s garden wall.
I’ll remember that one on the way home tonight.
7. Baboons can tell the difference between English and French. Zoo keepers at Port Lympne wild animal park in Kent are having to learn French to […]

“…less that 1mm left on that tread…”

You can Hypnotize Chickens
A chicken can be hypnotized, or put into a trance by holding its head down against the ground, and continuously drawing a line along the ground with a stick or a finger, starting at its beak and extending straight outward in front of the chicken.
If the chicken is hypnotized in […]

Get Maddox’s outlook on life…and drawing…
It’s old but hey, the sh*t is still funny!

The engagement ring, the wedding ring, the suffering.

“…the human being and fish can co-exist peacefully…”
“…you’re working hard to put food on your family…”
“.. fool me once, shame on you. You fool me you can’t get fooled again.”
“…”
A short documentary on greatness

When shooting craps, Mr. T can roll a seven with only one die.
Mr. T is actually Chuck Norris’ black twin, who was born at the same time, and simultaneously grew a beard along side Chuck Norris.
Mr.T actually invented Pita Bread. But he accidently named it Pity Bread, and it was therefore shunned by the […]

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.
Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.
Mr. T survived a roundhouse kick to the face from Chuck Norris. He was […]

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; […]

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse… horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but […]

Fridge magnet

Click to enlarge.

Following in the rediculously stupid (but brilliant) footsteps of the Million Dollor Homepage, Kyle McDonald has started One Red Paperclip; an idea so overwhelmingly stupid that you know it has to work.
The premise: start with a single red paperclip, and keep trading it up for something better.
The goal: to trade up to a house.
And before […]

Beats using his horn.

The Sun has a nice little article about some of the dumbest quiz answers on radio and TV.
Here’s a snip:

Family Fortunes:
1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword
2) What’s Hilter’s first name? Heil
3) A dangerous race? The Arabs
4) A famous Royal? Mail
Radio Lincs phone-in:
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: […]

Who Represents?, a database for agencies to the rich and famous: http://www.whorepresents.com
Second is the Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views: http://www.expertsexchange.com
Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island: http://www.penisland.net
Need a therapist? Try: http://www.therapistfinder.com
An Italian Power company: http://www.powergenitalia.com
The Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales: http://www.molestationnursery.com

Are we about to be hit by a Nerd Flu epidemic?
The nerd flu, while common, is hard to track because it is often difficult for health care workers to diagnose. People suffering from the nerd flu may exhibit symptoms including pale or clammy skin, exhaustion caused by minimal physical effort, difficulty communicating in socially acceptable […]

Courtesy of J Brizzle
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with […]

Not quite what he had in mind

… they’ll just be hanging Glitter …